Dealing with break ups -- How do people do it??

Well i aint no expert but i have been through a not so nasty break up... but this woman i loved with all i got.....(seriously i loved her at some point it got sad coz i was loving sum1 who did not love me back) Pathetic right??

U dnt have to tell me... Coz i know. But there was nothing i could do about it so i thot.

On that note. Doing nothing about it was the best way to go around it. I have a few steps that i took and i would like to share them. Feel free to add and comment from your own experiences but this worked best for me.

1. Be sure that you have done everything you can to make the relationship work and the other person still isn't showing interest. Because there is nothing worse than living with the regret of giving in too early

2. After that give yourself time, it is very hard this stage(your always going to want to speak with them(try resist the urge as much as you can. This comes with a alot of activities to distract yourself.(or you can just talk to some1else about it to put your mind at ease.
--- It may take a while don't fight it as much coz ur still going to love them for a while instead just admit to yourself you love them and give yourself more time...(meet new people) always fun

3. After admitting and not trying too hard to forget you will find yourself at ease eventhough it will take a while but the pain goes away all that remains is the good memories or and plus maybe occasional missing of some1 but that is okay do not beat yourself up about it. (Trust me I know)

oohh an additional step if u find sum1 u like, do not starve yourself of a chance to have a good time. The next person always speeds up the forgetting/pain-reduction process. yes am talking abt a rebound but u should atleast like the re-bound, wen u actually do it with the wrong intentions, its gonna bite u in the ass.

Thats my three step procedure.. not too perfect but those three things have worked wonders for me.

PS: Do not judge me.... I hope this helps!! :D

Relationship between Job Interviews and Dating

I am going to be a little more biased in this topic and base it to the process of a guy approaching a girl he likes:

When going for a job interview there is always thing that have to be done prior to attending the interview eg: prior knowledge about the business and the position you are going to be applying for.
An interview for a job can be heart throbbing they make people go through many phases feeling nervous, some feel excited at the same time, scared(because you just have to do it cause you need a job). All these feelings depend on how the individual feels about the interview and that opportunity.(Can you tell the similarity of this situation and the one of approaching a girl??)

Well during the interview session the interviewers are always looking for characters which will make you a worthy candidate for the job(same thing a woman/girl will do). The qualities are confidence in the candidate, the interviewee has to be able to show that he knows what he is talking about and he is the right man for the job(Overconfidence does not work.. you will just come through as arrogant).The confidence you bring on the table comes from the balance of the knowledge that the interview is an opportunity but it is not the only option or opportunity - In this scenario you start talking to the girl who is your target, the girl wants to know if you are confident and are the right man for her(same as during the interview session).

It is been proven women are experts to figuring out easily if a man they are talking to lacks self confidence by only talking to them a few seconds or just studying their body language. Which is mostly the major deal breaker with the ladies. And as I said about the interview, the mentality you come up with on the table when you are approaching a girl should be the same as for the job interview. Approaching with the mentality that this is an opportunity to meet a girl you fancy but it is not the only opportunity and she is not the last girl in the world(Not the last job in the industry). This would help you with confidence and you will not look needy. Which is not good for you or the girl your talking to.

Having addressed all these issues i truly believe that many aspects of our life are connected to each other. Situations might be different be we react in the same way.

This is all from a heated Discussion with a female companion Mel

PS: Its not plagiarist since i referenced you.

The Million Dollar Question: Can guys and girls be "best" friends??

Whoever knows me will tell you, day in day out I always argue this point and my position is always on the NO.If some1 can show me a long term man to woman friendship without turning into love or lust then by all means please write to me.

The conclusion i come up with is due to daily experiences both my own and also other peoples' as-well. Anyone who disagrees with me would probably want to know why I say what I say.Well first of all just to clarify; this does not include the relationship of a gay guy and a girl...... Thats an exception to this rule/observation just like any other rule has exceptions.

Now coming back to my reasons/facts. If a guy and a girl claim that they are best friends then it i either one of the following scenarios:

Fact 1: They both like eachother and do not want to spoil the relationship in which case they will eventually end up hooking up anyway.

Fact 2:either one or the other likes the person they claim to be best friends with but the other person does not seem to show much interest in them so they settle as friend(next best thing) and also in which case might end up in this scenario for the group to hook up(less likely than the first one, but given the correct scenario it is likely).

Well those are a few observed facts that am going to leave you with. but the major cause of all this havoc and mayhem has been caused by sexual tension (as written on the Mx paper of the 27th of August 2010). In this era relationships(many) do not exist without sex.And if there is no sex then relationships do not exist.(Again its not what i believe... this is just another observed fact)...

Food for thought

Why exactly is chasing after a girl is called hunting??

Predators don't play

Talk about sleezy

After some research., scientists have discovered a certain similarity between prey in the animal kingdom and girls in the social spectrum, and it is a major similarity indeed. Take this into perspective now.

The prey, no matter which it is, need to be able to see not only what is in front of them, but also be aware what is around them. This special characteristic is to enable them to see when predators are lurking around. This is also more commonly known to be peripheral vision. On the flipside, men have very well oriented foveal view, they are more tunnel-visioned which means their eyesight is almost always focused to what is ahead or in front of them. This is a same characteristic that is observed within animals that are predators, those that are higher up on the food chain.

Peripheral vision allows for multi-tasking. For example, a gazelle might be chewing grass but at the same time can spot a predator from a distance who is slowly nearing beside it. This is similar to a woman talking to her friends or a guy while pointing to a guy that is beside or almost behind her without even turning her head. It’s about being aware of your surroundings. The dating life, much like in the animal world, is survival of the fittest. Shape up or shape out.

Due to these theories the conclusion can be drawn without any doubt that the similarity in a scenario of a lion preying on a zebra and a man going after a woman.... which in some cases too it leads to drooling from both man and lion.

Yezzir.


Consider this example too, of how often women escape the clutches of men who actually think they’ve got them where they want them. We’ll compare this with an analogy of a cheetah and gazelle. A cheetah is the fastest of all animals, it can reach blistering speeds which make it so deadly when it’s doing what it does best; chasing the prey. A gazelle, on the other hand… while not the fastest, just so happens to be fast enough and more importantly, is known to be great at escape. A cheetah will hunt a gazelle every day and many times, be unsuccessful. And why is this? Why is the fastest predator not always going to catch the gazelle? It’s simple. A gazelle has the numbers advantage, they can change direction much, much easier due to not moving so quickly and they have greater endurance when it comes to running. Cheetahs can reach their blistering speeds but not maintain it. Instead they tire themselves out, so take a sprinter and put him against a long distance runner in a race that will last over thirty seconds… and the sprinter’s chances of victory severely decline. In order to capture the gazelle, the cheetah must be willing to accept failure every so often, as it’s the only way to eventually succeed. Women can appear as they’re in the palm of your hand, only to them slip out unexpectedly. They’ve got the strength in numbers, they’ve got the sharper mind and they can certainly play the game for longer. I guess if you’re a girl, you’ve got to catch her quickly… ‘cause let her escape one too many times, and you just might not ever get her.


>> the chase is gud but there is no better feeling like catching a prey after a good old run around -- a lion would say the same thing or in this case a cheetah.

SHU!

Best I ever had

If I didn't know you better, I could certainly predict where you think am heading with this! Well so to say, the mind is a the most powerful tool we possess so keep thinking; more specifically on the best thing you've ever had. Differentiate from what you don't have or the ones you will be having, just focus on what you have or rather had.

Confusing as it seems, this thought has crossed my mind many times and I kept thinking of a good answer incase someone asked me the same question. I could compose a list: first roll with a car, first kiss, first time getting laid, the best present, winning a lottery/medal/certificate, high school graduation, girlfriend, first self made program, best speech/assignment/delivery, ocean dive, beach holiday in summer......the list goes on and on and on! First time for everything, I am sure its the same case even for you out there, but take note to the things I have mentioned, none of which lasts longer than a moment and if they do, you'll eventually get used to, bored and cast them away like a depreciating valuable item.

I can't come up with a better answer to what is the best I ever had, but that was then and this NOW. If there is anything best that I have had, have and will still be having is friends and family, irreplaceable till the end no matter what. I am sure Will Smith must have been fucked up being alone in 'I am Legend' because there is nothing more scarier than that. Just so you agree, I shall run the list down and reveal the importance of friends and family: I had my driver to roll the car with, a kissed a friend in a spur of a moment, getting laid.....well isn't that obvious, winnings happen only with other competitors to prove you the best, any graduation sucks without having friends to celebrate with and so is the beach holiday in summer, program I made had to have someone to brag about to, speeches and assignments are empty without an audience, most likely your friends and family, ocean dive....well I did that alone which is why am sharing it with you now!

It's a butterfly effect out there, your reading my post and at the same time, your probably annoying someone or making them happy, whatever the case, your the best they ever had!

High times of clubbing life

A clipboard to a bouncer is like a line of coke to an addict. Without what they feel they need in their possession, they’re everything they don’t want to be; weak. Power is a privilege that too many big-yet-hollow-headed hacks take for granted and abuse without knowing any better. What gives them the right to choose? To discriminate? To play God and for what, for a dancefloor? For self-assurance and some strewed form of value? Oh I get it, I get it… they’re doing the hard stuff. They’re making it easier on us by being hard on us, right? Wrong. They don’t know shit, they pick and prod at what looks good and what doesn’t through their own petty perception. You know to know how smart these men really are? Ask them a logical fucking question. See, one of those is like kryptonite to a shopping list hugger, I mean guestlist-supervising son of a bitch. They’ve got some paper but no real thoughts to put on it other than what their ashamed mother requests them to bring home so she can cook dinner. Yes, that’s right, I wouldn’t be surprised if half of ‘em are still living at home but you know what makes me smile, people? It’s how they look exactly like the kind of clown that no decent place would admit entry to. Ironic, ain’t it? And a bit sad too. These days ID’s aren’t important, special occasions don’t matter and neither do the times in which you rock up. It all comes down to either having or not having a dick and if you do… club hopping is like a game of Russian roulette except instead of your life being on the life… your dignity bites the bullets instead.

All this is also a result of our naivity. Too many times we had a session with the bouncers at clubs. There hasn't been a night that atleast once the guys at the door haven't pulled us out cause of the guestlist bullshit, or as we like to refer to it as the "BC-MAH" -- "Bouncers Cover My Ass Handbook". There is only so many times you can be pulled out of the club so that you realise there is something you are doing wrong. Well as for me, or should i say as for our bunch the climax had to be last night 14th August of 2009. I have never been so angry, and the funny thing is I came to realise I was not angry at anyone i was angry with myself, and i could see other guys in the group with the similar feeling.

It was all making sense now, well that bell had to be rung into our ears for a couple of clubbing nights until the message got through. Disappointed and ashamed because we could not learn from our mistakes earlier. Someone slaps you in da face once, Its okay maybe you didn't see him but the next ten times does the same thing while you are standing right there. mmhhh... Makes you wonder.

It's a matter of pride but also not taking these incidents personally 'cause at the end of the day, it happens to many guys all looking for the same thing as us; a fun night out. Is that too much to ask for these days? Apparently so, especially when you can get yourself kicked out of a McDonalds... 'cause ain't that just a McBitch? A McKick in the fuckin nuts....

We have learnt our lesson, if not we, then I have learnt my lesson. Next time we have an occasion, Major factor to consider is careful planning and contigency plan before hand.

YEZZZIR!!!

Scare of my life

Lately, something happened in my life that really shock me. Last month I was crusing with this girl we actually really had a good time.

Until a couple of weeks ago when I recieved a message from this girl. She told me this, and i quote " Louis, We need to talk". I mean as human beings we always have something going through our minds when a man or a woman says something like this.

I had alot of questions in me so i agreed to meet with her. She came over my house and slowly she told me "louis, i have missed my mensturation for over a week now". I didn't really freak out externally but my heart was punding so hard i could almost hear it. Scared shitless..... i almost thot my life was going to be over.

so i asked her if she did a pregnancy test, she actually told me she went to the doctors for consultation n testing. Doctor told her that the test is negative, BUT, because it was only two weeks in the tests are mostly inconclusive so she was to go back in 8weeks time.

Am sitting there having an internal prayer, now am scared and she is scared. Trying not to look scared just so she doesn't freak out of her skin.... "

To be honest i had no freaking idea what was gonna happen n what to do. but i had to stay positive.

waiting day after day and hour after hour to receive atleast a text that tells me that she has started her mensuration.

It was getting to me, i couldnt eat well, i couldnt sleep or study. reached one pointed that i was gonna convince myself it was going to be alright i even had a planned script of what to tell my Dad, friends and the people around me.

My young adult life was soon to be over, I already started thinking of Daddy responsibilities.

Well one pleasant friday morning which was 7th of August, the girl knocks to my door with a smile on her face and the first thing she tells me was, "Louis my periods have started."

I was still sleepy then so i had a double-take on what she said, i was like "what?". She told me again the same words. The rush of relief that flowed into my body was immense.

I have never been so releived and happy in my life.

Out of all this came the lesson of making conscious decisions, knowing what you are doing and taking the right measures in whatever i am doing in life. Not only when it comes to women.

Searching

As of lately i have been digging in so much just to find out what really is my purpose in life. I started reading books(which by the way isn't my thing people who know me can verify that) I am more of a sportish outdoor person.

Read books watched documentaries, just to find an answer but there isn't any valid answer but they all seem to be saying the same thing. The answers they provide are like maps you need to get there alone or with abit of help.

Goals, goals, goals... interchanged sometimes with vision. I ask myself, now what if you do not know what your goal is or what you love doing?

That is were the problem starts most of us do not know what we are supposed to be doing or what's we love doing?

For anyone who has figured out what to do please share, how you came about to realise your dream and what are your goals?

My goal at the moment is to figure out what is it that i have to be doing in life.

Introduction

Hey fellaz i just thought we could get together and put technology to good use.
Alright this blog if for all my hommies interested in having a good time and also who need any help with their thoughts in future planning

From my findings lately many young boys and girls do not plan and if we do we do not execute.

So if anyone has any ideas of what to do if you have set your goals, or if any person has any problems we should help eachother using this blog.

Any contributions will be appreciated.

Thank you for viewing and leave a comment.